Throw down the groove..

I think I speak for most all women when I say that one of the most treasured experiences of newly made motherhood is the prospect of getting back into shape after nine months of slobbiness.

If you're like me, idealistic and ambitious, the first thought through your head when you hear the news that you've got a alien growing in your abdomen, is: "No freeloader will EVER get as excellent treatment as THIS little freeloader."

Vitamins!
Exercise!
Massage! (the daily quest to think up ever new and inventive ways to con unsuspecting individuals into performing this service is a story unto itself)
Wheat germ! Spinach and assorted-health-foods-that-have-as-much-tastiness-as-a-sock!

HA!

The road to hell is paved with good intentions, my mama always told me -- though probably not in this context.
That wheat germ is still mostly full in the back of the fridge, the vitamins are lucky if I remember to eat them, and the exercise was shoved aside for the much more important task of Relaxing Naps. Hey, you can't cover ALL the bases.

Pre-belly I was in the habit of a vigorous workout as described (I wanted to add a humorous ps here about that post..see where I'm talking about having kids. Haha, I sure showed HER.) earlier with the effect of a rather pleasing 6 pack..of sorts. Observe:
Exhibit A












Post-belly I was lugging around a rather unwieldy keg:
Exhibit B








(Catch this latest craze from Finnish fashonistas! Holding your own breasts! Now you too can attain this stunning look, simply cup your hands over your chest and voila! a simple look that is guaranteed to turn heads.)



As a result, post-post-belly, I am left with a rather creaky and undisciplined amount of muscle and flesh to contend with.
Since our apartment complex boasts a gym, that sadly leaves me with no excuse.

Now here's the part where you all insert the appropriate and stimulating encouraging phrases such as:

You can DO it!
Good work!
Hallelujah!
Don't give up!

And in my dark moments of self-doubt when I am on the brink of ending it all (the exercise, that is) I will come back and read these softly written words of support and it will give me the strength I need to persevere to the glorious end!

Thank you Jesus!

Comments

Blog God said…
"Finnish Fashionists" hahahahaha!
Anonymous said…
When you think of way to get yourself to workout day in an day out instead of napping... lemme know.

It's a real stumper
BarbarianDave said…
I like how you went as far as to wear the same pair of pants for both shots. I'm sure you'll do great with the exercisem, being the fine, young, athletic woman that you are.
Maria said…
Just wanted to say "Go for it!" and "You can do it!" and all that good stuff. Just remember that it takes time, and don't get discouraged if you don't see all these wonderful changes within a couple months like you used to after an exercise splurge. Because you still have to eat more food than you usually would when trying to lose weight, for your baby's sake, things are going to take longer. Don't let it get you down! Keep fighting and you WILL succeed. This said from a mother who went right to a rigorous exercise schedule two months after her baby was born, but only could fit into most of her clothes when her baby was about 10 months old, and is still waiting for the last bit to go. Hey, maybe you're the type that can lose while nursing, others, they say they can't lose it all till they stop. Good luck to you, my fellow mother
Anonymous said…
wow... this post just scared me of my future. I'm finally going to have to discipline myself, dammit.
Forget it, Liz. I've concluded that the harder I try to lose it, the quicker it gains on me. Two months post birth I was losing, 4 months post birth I was a whale. I freaked but being as that I am both too lazy and too busy to workout, I told myself four words "To-hell-with-it!" There! Thus said, it felt so good that I do believe I've begun to lose weight! Yay! I'm one of those kinds that lose weight better when I don't think about it...Maybe I'm weird. I'll be happy if my tub doesnt hang over my pants, forget the six pack, I've already thrown that away along with my ambitions to be an ice-skating, ballroom dancing, journalistic genius!
Ha!
Don't worry, you always look great!

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