Month VII

Mi manche,

In the last two months you've ended up persuading me not to sell you to the gypsies. At the beginning, I was unconvinced cynic that I am, that you were worth your feed, so to speak and let me say -- you feed uncommonly bountiful. Good thing we're well stocked.

Anyways, every night before you went to sleep I patted your head, sung a lullaby as you attempted to get both legs behind your head and said, "You're too swell, tomorrow though I'm selling you."

That morning and evening would come and go and you would slyly do something winsome that would postpone the inevitable and make me say, "One more day, my little lad."

- You can sit up by yourself.
- You can shout "Li-AR" exceptionally well, although it's probably an incognizant mistake, it's a great party trick.
- You make me throw the blanket over your head in the morning and laugh at my gargoyle faces (I'll have you know you're one of only two people in existence who will humor me in this way and god bless you for it)
- You've started eating mushy peas and bananas, WHILE sitting up.
- You roll over. And the opposite way.
- If I'm reading you HAVE TO HAVE MY BOOK. I've just started reading to you from my own and you respectfully listen, head cocked, grunt when I've spoken an especially profound line, and in general have led me to believe that you might end up being of the learned sort. Not a complete tool. That's all I ask of you
- You told me the other day that "It's okay, don't bother, I'll change my own poop diaper" and promptly hopped your little white butt (that you might have inherited from me) into the tub. (this one might have been marginally mixed with a powerful daydream I've been harboring.)
I must add here to your list of accolades that you now no longer take delicate little baby poops. Thanks to the introduction of human food you have joined the males of your species in taking manly craps as well as the look of triumph on your collective faces when the mission is accomplished.

Each day, each night. Until finally I relented and consented to keep you for good. I guess this means it's 25 to life. Maybe they'll let me off at 18 for good behavior.

It's not all sweet sunshine and baby gurgles.
You've woken up some nights screaming "I AM A MIND-NUMBING SLEEP DEPRIVER!!!" in my ear while jabbing your babysoft heels into my lower abdomen. Thankfully, you pick the days when I have to be up at 7:30 to introduce me to Mr. Hyde.
Charming gentleman, that guy.

I can't complain about much else. You're kind of a bargain. And as with all bargains you can't help but wonder when the defect will raise it's sneaky ugly head, a faulty transmission, a puzzle with just one piece missing..but so far you've managed to hide it from my wary eye.

I'm pretty much satisfied with my deal, just don't let me catch you seducing the maid cause then it's outs for you. Thanks for showing me that good can tip the scales more heavily than the bad can. I love you...and I'ma going to eat your tummy.

War on Freedom?

Maybe if the Bush administration spent more time and money on fixing the obvious problems in their own country we wouldn't have this rash of bizarre violent outbreaks, ie Virginia Tech, NASA.
I read somewhere the other day a comment on how there was never a history of suicide bombers in Iraq up until the war started. So in essence the US has created an atmosphere of such desperation that men would feel compelled to do this. What's the point?
Don't even get me started on all the problems that have arisen with almost every member of the Cabinet.

Not a collected thought here, just a frustrated "stop the world, I want to get off".\


check it. check it.

Latest. Actually a Christmas present. Because I'm a cheapo...either that or I'm ridiculously generous. I've gotta give the original trees and sun design credit to Seth.

It's bigger than I'm used to which makes my knees weak. Wider than my arm span.

Pen and acrylic. I love the bleeding at the bottom of the stumps which I must fool with further.


If I had a scanner it would be a different font.

To do list:
  • House hunt!!
  • Buy toilet paper, lettuce. Totally unrelated.
  • Work out.
  • Find legitimate excuse not to work out.
  • Play trapeze artist, wow Avi with peek-a-boo expertise.
  • Scratch, sniff and pair drawer of random socks.
  • Pray.
  • Work out. Curse self for lagging abilities at subterfuge.
  • Sketch designs for fledgling company.
  • Make sweet love to myself.
  • Make sweet love to Stephen Colbert.
  • OH god! be completely embarassed about that last point.
  • Call contacts.
  • Feel empassioned about something or other.
  • Trick Avi into falling asleep through smoke and mirror techniques. (now you see the binky, now you don't)
  • Chill out with glass of wine.
  • Have another.
  • Hot tub.

A Better Post.

I miss you.
I love you.

Does this make liars? I'm not contradicting, I'm only trying to make the pieces fit.
Well well now.


To those who are about to rock, I salute you.

We've spent the past two weeks in the company of some cherished friends from "back in the day".

They chose Austin and more specifically Us as the destination for their Spring Breaks. Honored as I was that I was a chosen favorite over Cancun, The Bahamas and such debaucherous hotspots, I betook it upon myself to show them a historically worthy "rolling of the good times".
(Here I must compliment Heidi on her superior agenda skills. Were it left to me, it would have been a trip to the library, maybe Joe's Crab Shack and we'll call it a day.)

S.B'er #1: Nennie Pigs

I hadn't seen this neither of these little critters in a coons age. This one is my honorary sister, confidante, kindred, and soon to be proud graduate of UNC business college. Yay! Go Pigs!

A series of very laughing people follows:

S. B'er #2: Heaven Sexalicious

She is my accomplice, stunt double and musical tasting twin.

(Check out that nose piercing, and the labret. A bonding moment between the two. Funny funny)

We went cafe chilling, kite flying, 6th street hopping, and slumber partying. Muchas goodness.

Random photographs end this post:
Ps. Come back soon!

Say what you want to satisfy yourself. But you only want what everybody else says you should want

I was taking a long hot naked shower yesterday -- just kidding, I take fully clothed showers with cold water so as not to add to the global warming effect. As I was taking this hygienic downtime, I started ruminating over many slowly boiling issues that were bubbling precariously close to my surface.

Culmination: I have deviated from my original programming: My soul being is a true blue, gut wrenching, retarded, blindly stumbling into it, make or break me, delicate flower, fist clenching, say the wrong thing at the right time, revo-f**king-lutionary. I have - captialize, HAVE to have a perspective, an argument, a Reason.

So there it is again. Hel-Oh you! I guess I just lost it for a while with all the turbulence but vex yourself no more, good buddy, it's all back.

You know, I was looking around for a photo that would accompany this fine post. After hitting keywords like. burst. implode. whatnot. I realized I just wanted a photo of someone jumping the heck off a cliff. And not a like gravity's gonna kick in in 2 seconds type of jumping. But a I'm jumping off a cliff without any kind of life-support and in 2 seconds I'm goddamn gonna fly.