Visiting the dentist when you have to pee sucks.

My orthodontist, a certain Dr. Lindrum, is a rather attractive man in his mid-thirties with blue eyes and a charming grin. Having been gone for 2 years I'm due a visit.
I sit in the lumpy grey chair and pleasantly exhange niceties.

"How've you been? It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Yea well, I've been in Mexico..."

"Gab, small talk, gab"

I lie back, open my mouth and brace myself for the oral onslaught.

"Alright, I'm just going to poke around with my tool."


My juvenile mind is snickering uncontrolably at the innuendo. I try not to smirk. Dr. Lindrum looks slightly flustered and continues "poking".

Minutes pass and I'm counting checker patterns on the ceilinig above me and studying the dials on the spot light when my worthy doctor slips a metal contraption in my mouth, "Sorry," he states, "I know this is quite a mouthful."

A corner of my mouth quirks and poor Dr. L turns a shade of pink and nearly loses his pointy little instrument.

Inside, I am of course, unbelievably amused. You'd think that with years in the profession they'd get used to the subtle intimations or even use them as part of *humor in the workplace*. (Do you know that dentists have the highest rate for suicide in the world, this could be why.)

As he's finishing up, he comments, "You have the whitest teeth I ever came across."

Chortle chortle. Alright, well not quite but, grant me, it'd have been funny. Laughter does wonders for your lifespan.

Don't I know it.


zupa said...

ha!! that's really freakin funny

chad said...

how rich... I laughed